Outsource the laughing with it too?

uh oooooh... Mondays right?

News getting you down?

No worries... simply create an algorithm that scours all the major news sites and gives you a joke about the entire page just so you're completely up to date about what the entire world's vibe will be about all those really simple things of which there is absolutely nothing left to learn about since we already have all our conclusions ready anyways but seek distracting entertainment.... right?

Since that's what everyone keeps asking... that's what we made and we only use that and nothing else.

You get some jokes , and then comes the obligatory chuckle , after which the laugh track will tell you whether or not to exhibit further signs of "funny da" or not. And all of that will replace maybe 12 hours of having to listen to podcasts and stuff to maybe... just maybe hear a joke ... or not? So we simply go straight to the core without all that wasting of silly time and we're ready to judge everything and everyone instantly... all the way up to morally being absolved if it turns out we want to eradicati thousands or even millions of people somewhere else since we are having trouble choosing ice-cream flavours if more than one are presented , and if it's just one you're absolutely sure you need to complain about the lack of choice right?

So... That's why we decided to just read 3 jokes every day , and this way we're even better "up to date" than the actual date itself! Screw you future... we were here first! Ha!

(That's how that works down there in information consumption world doesnt it? well... enough talk... let's take it away shall we! )

First up today : www.reuters.com
(they do "Breaking International News" as a service to everyone else saying to "do news")

“Why are international investors so confused right now?”
“Because ‘deindustrialisation’ met ‘disinformation’ at the ‘Novorossiysk’ terminal and nobody knows who’s exporting what anymore!”

Then there's CNN off course... They buy stuff from Reuters but also make some news of their own sometimes ... they say.

Apparently the homepage of their website creates this joke today : https://edition.cnn.com/

“Why did the ‘extraterrestrials’ crash the Miss Universe pageant?”
“Because ‘imagespublishing’ called it a ‘Rotomairewhenua’ of beauty, but everyone knows it’s just a trafficked-mammal scam!”

And the trifecta today comes from Flanders Belgium... where... ummm... other things are considered important , hence the joke is definitely different.

Here's the joke coming out of their homepage : https://www.vrt.be/vrtnws/nl/

Waarom vraagt Netanyahu gratie aan de Belgische rechter?
Omdat hij gehoord heeft dat een “verkeersongeval” met een “kampeerauto” in Gistel zwaargewond kan maken, maar dat een “eindejaarsvoorraad escargots” stelen in Frankrijk je pas écht in de cel doet belanden!

Yup... That about sums it all up for this week.

Too bad I have to wait a whole week now to hear a "new" joke , but expectation is half the value isn't it? And they're all so... Original! Structure... topic... setup... the kick... all of it... just so... great!

All I want is more now?