Because I feel you more, but understand you less.

In the first stages of my life I had some complicated health issues and a challenging family environment.

My body was ravaged and ended up being weaker and slower than all my peers all the way through puberty … by something that started as a burst appendicitis. First near death experience.

I moved on.

Physical aggression and duplicity have been present through my journey to adulthood… from people I loved and respected , but who didn’t know what those things meant.

I moved on.

Academia was a challenge… not for me really… but for them. By the time I was 18 and given my full legal rights as an individual , I couldn’t find a single teacher or professor who had any answers whatsoever when I started pointing out certain hypocrisies and down right falsehoods in their curriculum , philosophy and intentions.

The organizations that are focused on convincing people they need to “get something” and then stop learning didn’t like me. And I didn’t like them.

I moved on.

My first “real job” kicked off something though… And it was in the very first days of the internet. I had to explain to businesses what email meant on a regular basis. But the entire unfolding space of the internet was an incredible source of learning and experience.

Starting as the very first support agent on the phone for that business , I ran the support department 1 year later with a team of 4 colleagues I selected myself.

And basically… things only went bigger and faster after that.

I know banks , I know governments , I know media , I know logistics , I know manufacturing , I know entertainment …

And when I say “I know” … I mean.. I see how their entire machine operates on the individual level , on the group level and the global level. I can accurately identify the forces that are driving eachother. Where the feedback loops are and what the direction is.

You’re going to say i’ve suddenly become arrogant now right? Well… sorry, but it’s just true and I’ve had the career to prove it too.

That's really easy to do you know... when they give you ALL their data and ask you to do something with it. I've done nothing else for those kinds of players for 25 years now.

I've visited and investigated the perceived best and worst places in the world. I walked over proverbial (and even small literal ones) rivers of fresh human blood in the jungles of Congo and even spent time in the place where humanity invented the Ebola virus.

After spending time there... a corona virus "pandemic" is not really something that reaches you... So in all that panic of most… I had a lot of time to think and do good things. Just like all those years before them. I never like it when people call me smart and stuff like that. The only real difference is that I’ve apparently had the luxury of paying enormous attention to everything, and then having time to think about it a lot, and then investigate some more… Because it just makes you happy to be experiencing reality fully with all your senses you know? Always doing the right thing… Always knowing you’re peak healthy , full of energy , full of creative ideas.

I’ve also haven’t had to visit a doctor in over 15 years now, and I don’t even have to take any medication whatsoever. Not even things like aspirin against headaches and stuff. Those things are so rare , and usually the direct result of something really stupid I did so I just sit there a few hours and feel it , and it goes away.

I've been to places like China and South Africa... Australia and the US... Every farthest corner of Europe and everything in between.

Doing my absolute best to investigate all dimensions of cultures and mechanisms in place there. I learned how immensely different this world is everywhere you go... except for one thing.

Everywhere... the fantasy lives that the rest of the world is probably kind of the same but filled with worse people than themselves.

Dear humanity..; You are stupid as fuck! The only animal on this planet that can keep doing bad things that hurt themselves while still finding a way in their mind to keep doing it.

Humans don't bring "intelligence" to nature...

We are the only ones that bring the stupid to a perfect system.

Add to that the complete bottom up experience of everything the internet ever did, down to the very bit level. (I still love to read network packet traces just for the fun of it… The chatter of protocols and their error correction mechanisms can be quite fascinating. We used to have to fight broadcast storms and stuff like that. Fascinating times.

It is because of all this experience that I started having a completely different experience in life than most around me.

What was magic and new for everyone else , was something boring in the past for me since it had no mysteries anymore about it. and I usually didn't feel any kind of interest for all the new hypes and things ... Because I always understood where they came from and what they really were. Steps towards this point you have all only now realized.

And this pattern just kept going. I still love it though. Definitely not complaining here. Quite the opposite.

I think a lot. But I hardly ever worry. There’s a big difference between those two things you know.

Some call it meditating… and it’s a kind of that thing indeed. But I practice many other types of that too. Active and passive.

I have zero hangups about what I eat or drink , and all my biological metrics are always perfect according to the medical professional. My biological age is atleast 10 years younger than my calendar one at 46.

I am in a continuous game of cuju between my mind and my emotions. And that conversation is perfectly suitable to identify exactly what my body needs for sustenance and when… I just listen to it. I do everything when I can and need to , not when an external schedule dictates it. My internal conversation is never in doubt , because it always remains focused on itself.

I can stand up and walk 50Km at a very brisk pace at any point in time basically. I could start at 2 at night or at 5 in the afternoon and just do that. That’s the energy reserve always present at all times.

I can always find a philosophical way out of all my feelings and states of cognitive dissonance I ever encounter.

Accidents still happen though.

After one of the many calamities in my life , I once literally lost everything. Homeless and no food sort of thing even. The victim of horrible crimes… Sometimes the line between accidents and willfull crime is a vague one. But the result to the accidentee is just the same.

I entered a state of clinical depression and dragged myself out of it in a few months and started over. Shit happens you know?

I moved on.

And 5 years ago.. I already saw all the things that happened recently.

I had zero surprise about Musks Nazi salute. That was soooo obvious years in advance.

Zero surprises about Trump’s reelection and what he’s doing now. That was soooo obvious in his last term.

Zero surprises about the fantasies that big tech tell us while bleeding our sanity dry. (They had to ask techy’s to make those things for them remember? aaaah… you don’t. Because they didn’t have to ask you? did they?)

Zero surprises about the escalations between global superpowers. I mean… What else could they have done, when they’ve all clearly shown they have never done anything else for ages now.

But I had this very dreadful feeling about 5 years ago ,that apparently all of you are only now realizing.

Ok… welcome back to the present people… because in a way.

You were all stuck in 1984. (not the one you don’t even remember anymore… but the one from the book of which you know the title , but of which a totally different connotation has been made by something called “Reality TV” if there ever was a sign things were heading horribly wrong already. When a show called “Big Brother” becomes “popular” … You sort of know how bad it’s allready gotten. But you all totally ignored it.

That’s what it looks like to me.

I moved on.

How you ask?

Here's what I started doing about it about 5 years ago when all these things were glaringly obvious since they weren’t hiding anything anymore. (Nobody noticed really... distracted in the sounds of silence while thinking it will happen to someone else and everyone still feeling pretty good about all their choices) . First I wrote a book compounding my entire state of mind. For myself , but it turned out to be something i wanted to share.

The book in pdf form : https://www.chilltervention.it/_files/ugd/87fc4e_dd60d1673e3149eabe35178ad5c0b3cd.pdf

And by finishing the book with diligence, I found the solution I want to work on, making sure it fits with all my thoughts completely , in every dimension, in every way of life. And then I started working on the solution... knowing i'll never stop untill i'm dead.

Because I'm healthy and I know what to do. Everything else is a luxury. I have never had trouble sleeping after a hard days work.

And every day is the same anyways.

I always sleep well.

It's not been "fun" these days... but it has been "good" ... like it always has been.

And if it hasn’t been for you. I suggest you write your own book about everything you beleive in. Keep it a total secret if you want. But complete the story. Write down where you give up hope , where you stop thinking , where you stop beleiving and where you stop pretending as if it’s really true that “this” is “all you can do” about any of it.

Really? I mean…. really? It’s not because you “can’t write” … It’s not because you don’t “want too” … It’s not because you don’t “need to” … All those excuses are all the same one.

You’re too scared to admit to yourself you’re still the emotional and intellectual equivalent of a rock rolling down a hill , and not even feeling bad about it when you roll over the skulls and bones of even your own children’s future. You can’t even be honest with yourself, which makes it impossible to be truly honest to anything else anyways… And all this while you’re continuously complaining everyone else is dishonest, but you’re just seeing the world the way you are, and not the way the world is. But bring enough of those kinds of insanities together, and those lies all become the truth eventually. But was that the story you told yourself and others you were going for? The whole thing is one gigantic Abilene Paradox wrapped in mental ilness really.

That fear of having to realize : THAT is what’s stopping you from doing better.

The fear of having to realize you need to do better , but you prefer to be too lazy, too greedy, too agressive and too needy about it.

don’t agree? Sure… prove me wrong and give me your book that you wrote about all this and we’ll talk ok? Untill then? Leave me alone… You’re a danger to society and everything and everyone around you. It’s evidenced by actual reality 24/7 isn’t it?

This isn’t arrogance.

This isn’t agression.

This isn’t being an asshole.

This isn’t wrong to say it like that.

This is the neccesary discomfort that comes as a necessary byproduct of radical truth-telling in a delusional system.

Get over it people! And move on!